Why do I feel like everything is going wrong for me?

We all go through bad times and difficult times. However, sometimes we feel stuck and do not see light at the end of the tunnel. If you feel that way, this article will help you.

Last update: October 09, 2021

We have all gone through bad times or times when we feel that life is against us. In those moments, we go through a series of misfortunes that cause us to lose our way. So we wonder why everything goes wrong for me.

The truth is that bad streaks are normal, for life is full of ups and downs. We cannot pretend that we are always happy and that everything we set out to do goes as expected.

However, even if we are aware of it, it is difficult not to feel dejected when luck is not on our side. Then, without realizing it, we find ourselves in a state of helplessness, demotivation, apathy, depression and reluctance.

Even so, There are ways to deal with and overcome these situations.Ideally, we learn to take advantage of it and not allow it to defeat us. Below we will try to explain why sometimes we feel that everything is going wrong for us.

Why does everything go wrong for me? Possible causes of this feeling

Identifying the triggers behind negative events can help us experience greater control over the situation, which in turn will allow us to take control of the issue.

Low self-esteem

Self-esteem is a dynamic phenomenon. That is, it can vary over time, depending on the circumstances and personal characteristics. Therefore, it can become weaker or stronger.

Now, low self-esteem makes us doubt our own worth and makes us see ourselves in a much more negative way. In this way, it is not surprising that, having a weak self-esteem, we perceive everything around us under a lens of negativity.

Low self-esteem makes us think that only bad things happen to us and that we attract them. Therefore, if at any time you find yourself saying “everything goes wrong for me!”, ask yourself how is your self-esteem going. If this is low, it is best to go to a psychotherapist and work on self-esteem.



Filtering phenomenon

Behind the claim that everything goes wrong is often a cognitive distortion. People tend to perceive reality based on what we want to see; then, if we insist on seeing only the bad thing that happens to us, it is to be expected that we are mired in negativity.

In this case, the phenomenon of negative filtering refers to the tendency to forget the positive. Thus, we look only at the bad and do not see other aspects of reality.

We see reality through different lenses, depending on our self-esteem and our cognitive biases.

Learned pessimism

Pessimism is characterized by judging everything that happens in the worst possible way, in the sense that we make negative interpretations of what is happening and what is about to happen.

In many cases, this way of seeing reality is a learned cultural trait, which is integrated into the psyche of the person from childhood, making it difficult to get rid of it. Although not impossible.

Suffering from any disorder

Behind the feeling that everything goes wrong there may be a psychological problem or disorder that requires therapeutic intervention. Mood disorders, such as anxiety and depression, often lead to a negative and pessimistic view of reality.

For example, people who suffer from depression often blame themselves for bad things that happen to them and tend to think they deserve their misfortunes. Likewise, they devalue themselves and attribute their own achievements to luck.

Difficult situations

It is also important to note that sometimes difficult events happen, beyond our control. For example, the death of a relative, the downturn of the economy, natural disasters. They are situations that happen, so it is essential to learn to accept them.

At this time, the ideal is to keep in mind that everything is temporary and seek support from our loved ones or a professional. Remember that life is not always the color of roses.

What to do when everything goes wrong?

To face and overcome misfortunes, the essential thing is not to lose your cool and not get stuck in thought that everything goes wrong for me. Remember that there are always solutions.

Recognize that everything happens

Sometimes tough times feel like they will last forever. But no problem lasts a lifetime. So, in these situations, remember that everything happens.

Keep in mind the things that do go well

When we go through difficult times, it is hard for us to recognize those things that are going well. In these cases, it’s easy to dismiss the good and focus only on the bad. That said, keep in mind that there are always positives.



Identify what is in your control and what is not

Ask yourself what aspects of the situation are up to you. Can you control them? Once you have identified what is up to you and what is not, accept the idea that there are things you cannot control.

Learning that there are things that are beyond our control allows us to better manage emotions.

Take some time to relax

There are many relaxation techniques that help us feel calm and rested. Practicing them constantly can help us to overcome gloom and negativity.

Ask for professional help

If you feel like you can’t get out of this situation alone, it is best to see a mental health professional. Remember that negativity and pessimism can be indicators of a disorder; in this case, therapeutic intervention is the best option.

Something good will come out of all this

It doesn’t matter how bad the situation is; something good will almost certainly come out of it. At the very least, you are likely to learn a life lesson. Remember that everything happens.

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