What is agamy?

Agamy is a new model that motivates to reinterpret couple relationships. Today we teach you everything you need to know about it.

Reviewed and approved by the psychologist Elena Sanz on October 16, 2021.

Last update: October 16, 2021

Today, we are familiar to a greater or lesser extent with the concepts of monogamy and polygamy. In the first case, reference is made to exclusively sexual or loving relationships between two people. On the contrary, the second refers to the relationships that are maintained between more than two. But what happens when you want to avoid these categories? The answer is in agamy.

Agamia is a recent concept that has aroused interest among those trying to deconstruct the traditional model of society. It is formed by the Greek prefix to (without) and gamia (intimate union). In very simple terms, it is the rejection of intimate unions of any kind. We explain more about it.

Characteristics of agamia

The term agamia was used for the first time in its founding text in 2014. By then, and even now, it was emerging as a revolution in the way people build their lives following the standards of society.

His manifesto proposes the following premises:

  • Rejection of the idea of ​​love established by society.
  • Reestablishment of reason as the central axis for decision-making.
  • Reconsideration of relationships from the point of view of ethics.
  • Discard the idea of ​​gender (all of them).
  • Rejection of the social idea of ​​beauty.
  • Replacement of the idea of ​​sex by eroticism.
  • Relief from feelings of jealousy out of indignation.
  • Substitution of the idea of ​​family by free grouping.

Since these parameters are very flexible in terms of their interpretation, agamy is not a closed idea like that of a marriage. In 2020, its founder announced the publication of Agamia. Program for collective relational emancipation. Day one, where these and other principles are set forth more thoroughly.

In any case, agamy consists of the rejection of the idea of ​​relationship that one has today. It does not matter if it is traditional (between two people, man and woman) or liberal (between several, of different sexes). In a way, agamy seeks explore other alternatives that provide freedom.

The term should not be confused with asexuality, sapiosexuality or many others that have become popular in recent years. Nor does it propose or encourage sexual abstinence, although of course, it does invite us to reflect on the way relationships are built.

Agamy moves away from the traditional patterns of marriage to propose another form of bond.


What’s behind agamy?

Destroying the relationship models that have accompanied societies for centuries is a radical proposal. Despite this, and although he does it in a different order, the general ideas about marriage and the couple have changed in recent decades. In a sense, the model is an alternative to toxic relationships.

According to studies and research, new generations are more likely to leave the traditional model behind than those that precede them. In other words, the current generation is open to turning their backs with greater permeability to some precepts that were considered traditions in their parents or grandparents.

An example of this is living together without marriage. The evidence indicates that cohabitation is a relationship model that has increased relative to marriage. Many who are in a relationship prefer to live together rather than marry. A trend opposite to that of a few decades ago.

The evidence also suggests that the number of relationships that assume the model of living separately has also increased with respect to previous data. More couples decide to bet on a stable relationship that is based on living separately. The reasons, of course, vary with each case.

These examples make it possible to elucidate that the traditional relationship model has changed during the last decades. If to all this we add the reflections around gender identity, the possibility of having open relationships and the way to express love, it does not seem unreasonable that a movement like agamia proposes a total revolution in this regard.

Relationship models have changed in recent decades and agamia is more likely to find sustenance in society.


Consequences of agamic thinking

Whether you are for or against agamy, it is undeniable that the model generates a series of consequences. Keep in mind that it preaches the rejection of the idea that one has of a relationship, but not of the links themselves. In this sense, it is not against a bond between a group of people or the raising of children.

The problem is found in the legal vacuum. Agamy is a model that is not endorsed by any nation in the world. In practice, their experience is very limited. Issues such as labels parents or legal mothers and the responsibility that this implies partially destroys thought.

On the other hand, it is also important to point out the difficulty to materialize some of its premises. Many are ambiguous and even inconsistent with each other (starting with the etymology of the term itself). If we stick to its lexical origin, agamy is a model that would promote singleness, although this is not the only possible alternative within its postulates.

Regarding singleness, many studies invite us to reflect on its consequences for people’s well-being. Men and women assimilate it differently. Many variables are compromised when assessing quality of life.

In any case, it is important to note that agamy is a relatively new idea. It is not a closed model, so that everyone can interpret it and assume it from the beginning.

You can delve further into it in the links that we have left to its manifesto or by reading the book in which the theory that supports it is better exposed. It is not ruled out that their postulates mature with the contribution of those who reflect on the matter.

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