What are liquid relationships, how to understand the new forms of love in millennial times

Depending on the time and the society in which we find ourselves, our way of relating changes. Now, the millennials they opt for a slower love, which means that they take much longer than their parents to formalize their relationships since they give priority to getting to know each other little by little. Friendship and love are often confused and stable relationships they begin to rank lower on our list of priorities. All these characteristics can be related to the liquid lovea concept coined by the Polish sociologist Zygmunt Baumann.

In his book, Liquid love. About the fragility of human bonds (2003), Bauman portrays a model of interpersonal relationship characterized by the «lack of solidity, warmth and by a tendency to be more and more fleeting and superficial. It involves the refusal to establish deep emotional roots with other people in order to remain emotionally detached in order to fit into an environment in which constant mutation without assuming the responsibility that a lasting relationship entails. Today, more importance is attached to present experience, untethered freedom, and instant gratification bodily and intellectual needs.

For Bauman, nowadays love relationships are based more on physical attraction than in a deep connection between people. They are relationships marked by individualismin which both members of the couple seek the immediate satisfaction of their desires, reaching the commodification of personal relationships. That person that attracts us is nothing more than a piece of meat that must be tasted, and it is not necessary for us to worry about his desires, concerns, needs, tastes…

Applications like Tinder they only encourage this idea of ​​liquid love. We went to her like when our mothers went window shopping pointing out their objects of desire and throwing out those dresses they didn’t like. Faced with the first problem in their relationship, those people who follow liquid love throw in the towel and they are going to look for a new subject to consume in the wide range available in their main application. Let’s not get confused, it is not that we have to stay with that couple that does not convince us just for establishing some stronger tiesbut neither deny any type of commitment to continue in a constant search for immediate satisfaction.

The truth is that Bauman may be right in his analysis, but for the sociologist, in matters of love any time passed was better which has been criticized. Relate the way of relating to the past with values firmer and less ficklewhich may be partly right, but without forgetting that, in the past, the reasons for remaining united were due in many cases to the economic and social weakness of women and religious issues that we are not going to go into at this time.

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