The 20 most important rules that psychology gives to live better
Many times you can feel that things do not go as you wish. Or yes, but you do not feel like you expected. Why is it so hard sometimes to find the true balance in life? Why do we achieve goals and do we feel as well as we would like?
The reality is that it is not easy to face life and the challenges that it poses without a little guidance. Some may do it on their own, but many decide to turn to experts in psychology to find some answers.
Throughout his career, the prestigious Russian psychologist Mikhail Litvak has seen many people in that situation. From the study of all these cases, he put together a list of 20 rules to live better and be a better version of oneself.
Do you want to know what they are?
> Do not pursue happiness
Pursuing happiness does not lead you to it. Above all, because it is not outside: it is something that is born within you. If you develop your skills and reflect on your needs, achievements and goals, surely you feel happier than if you try to find happiness abroad.
Your opinion is the best
If you are satisfied with yourself and have the assurance of being good and intelligent you will never need other people to have that judgment on you.
Take control of your actions
If you really want something in your life, you can not wait for others to tell you what is best for you. Do not ask for permission, you have control of your actions. If you know what is good for you, go for it.
Be a mature person
An immature person often has the knowledge but does not know what to do with it. On the other hand, maturing implies understanding that everything you know has a meaning if you put it at the service of what you need.
(You may also be interested: 15 phrases by Carl Jung so you can understand yourself better)
Organize your goals
Planning what you want, how and when you want it is a good way to live focused. So, although things do not go well, you will know that you are going the right way and that will give you peace and happiness.
When a relationship or a person hurts or becomes toxic, you should walk away. It is true that sometimes it can be complicated, but the best option is to keep moving forward. If that person is left behind because of his selfishness and lack of merit, you should not take charge.
Do not be complacent
You can not please every person, it is impossible. And if you try, you will only manage to feel uncomfortable and emotionally tired.
Pay your debts
Many times we feel tied to a person because he has done a lot for us. But that prevents us from moving forward.
Pay your debts, give thanks, return the favor … And go your way.
Do not suppress your feelings
Some feelings can be ugly. For example, sadness, depression, anxiety. But even if they are not pleasurable sensations, you should never repress them, because sooner or later they will reappear. You must go through them, face them and you will see that after the process you will have learned something very valuable for you.
(You may also be interested: Freud's psychological test that reveals your true perception of life today)
Talk to everyone and listen to them
Talking to friends and people you appreciate is nice and fun but you can also find it useful to talk to your enemies. This can make you learn new things about yourself. For example, it can make you more aware of your defects and bad habits.
Keep your feet on the ground
If you are someone who enjoys daydreaming, that's fine, but it's also important that you have realistic goals. Otherwise, you will end up losing your focus and feeling frustrated.
Interior training is always enriching, and books are the best tool for this.
Do not waste your time dedicating yourself to snooping in the lives of others. In truth, envy does not help you at all. Better use that time to improve some of your own skills.
If you want to discover who your biggest enemy is, you just have to look in the mirror. Once you face yourself any other adversary will be defeated.
> Do not pay so much attention to criticism
There will always be someone who criticizes you, but you should not pay attention to those comments. Remember that the more successful you are, the harder the criticism will be. Envy is a dark feeling, but if you have fulfilled your goals and are happy, the judgments of others should not make a dent in your spirit.
Prioritize your growth
If a job, a relationship, a career or any other situation in your life is getting in the way of your personal growth, you should consider taking a distance. Any healthy relationship should complement you and allow you to be better.
Loneliness is not an enemy
Do not think of loneliness as something to be avoided at all costs. Quite the contrary, lonely moments are exceptional to listen to your interior and discover what you really need in life.
Forget about gender stereotypes
There is no such thing as feminine or masculine logic. What does exist is the ability to be wise and think correctly. It does not matter what your gender is or what is expected of it. You are a free person and you must allow yourself to feel and be what you want.
Happiness is only real when it is shared
It is true that loneliness is beneficial, but do not forget that we are sociable people. Therefore, if you keep your achievements to yourself, they will never have the same value. On the other hand, sharing them with the people you love will be what will give you real meaning.
Live for you, not for others
Learn to live for yourself without the need to prove who you are in front of other people. Otherwise, you could spend the rest of your life trying to please others.
What do you think of these tips? Would you add another?
Tips 4 life