Is it convenient to have friends with rights? 5 advantages and disadvantages

Can everyone have friends with benefits? The answer is no, since many times we are not compensated for all the disadvantages that there are.

Reviewed and approved by the psychologist Elena Sanz on November 09, 2021.

Last update: 09 November, 2021

Fuck friends, friends or friends with rights are terms that refer to the same type of relationship. One in which there are no ties nor fidelity and you enjoy sex. However, not all people can have this bond with their friends.

Having friends with rights is not a recent concept. In the newspaper ABC, in 2011, headlines such as the following caught our attention: One in three Spaniards declares that they have or have had a friend with the right to touch. But what do these relationships imply?

What does it mean to be friends with rights?

There is a phrase that defines very well what it means to have friends with rights that is from Alejandro Zambra: “We slept together, we shot wonderfully well and I will never forget her dark, warm and firm body. But it is not love that unites us “.

The basis of the relationship with friends with rights is friendship, not love as a couple. What you are looking for is to have a good time, enjoying sexuality and intimacy, but fleeing from everything that involves having a partner.

There is no future project together. You live in the present and each person is free to have other friends with rights.

A Latin topic could be used to define these relationships based on living in the moment: Carpe Diem. In them the future does not matter. There is an enjoyment, a sharing of sexuality, but there is no joint project, as in couples.

Relationships of this type are based on friendship and not on love as a couple. They work if both parties agree to it.


Advantages and disadvantages of being friends with rights

There are many advantages that we have mentioned superficially in the relationships of friends with rights. However, there are also downsides.

Next, we are going to address all those that we consider important to know if this type of relationship fits us or not.

1. Freedom is a very precious commodity

Feeling free is great. That is why some people decide to have friends with rights.

They don’t owe them anything, they don’t have to think about a future together and they don’t have to blame each other for sleeping with other people. Friends with rights move away from fidelity, from the commitments they might have with a partner, from feeling tied.

2. Getting excited is the end

There are movies like With the right to rub, which can create false illusions when one of the people who maintains a relationship of friends with rights falls in love. If it is not reciprocated, it may suffer and getting stuck in a kind of relationship you don’t want. This can be very painful and affect self-esteem.

3. It is not a friendship

This is closely related to the previous point because when you start to have feelings for the other person and everything ends, we realize that the basis of the relationship was nothing. There was no friendship because the union was based on having sexual encounters. Despite meeting that person for coffee or going for a walk, was it really a friendship?



4. Sex is great

One of the benefits of having friends with rights is that sex is great. This is because, when considering the other person a friend, there is confidence to tell him what one likes or does not like openly.

Also, since most of the encounters are to have sex, they take advantage of it! So this is ideal for exploring your own personal limits and enjoy full sexuality.

5. Can be finished at any time

If one of the two falls in love, the relationship ends. This is a possibility that will always be present for friends with rights, since in the most unexpected moment those encounters that until now were enjoyed can disappear. This must be borne in mind and assumed in due course so that it does not harm us.

The implicit contract of the friends with rights relationship has to be very clear so that no one gets hurt.

Does it pay to have friends with benefits?

Having friends with rights is neither a good nor a bad thing. If we are living a time when we do not want to have a stable relationship, but we want to have sexual encounters with someone, then this may be an option.

However, it is important that we be very careful if we make it a way to avoid being alone (because we suffer from emotional dependence) or if we have fallen in love. In these cases, it is best to seek psychological help to know how to get out of there.

Having friends with rights in these cases is not going to do us any good. On the contrary, it will cause us great pain.

We must avoid entering the relationships of friends with rights believing that what we have seen in the movies will happen. There is a good chance that this will not happen and that we will end up suffering. Therefore, it is convenient to be responsible in this type of links.

Relationships are complicated. It’s okay to experiment and try to find out what works best for us at certain times in our lives.

However, there are relationships that may not fit at all with our values ​​or what we want. Self-deception is sometimes a powerful tool that works against us.

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