6 tips for talking about sex with a teenager

Despite the fact that sexuality is a fundamental part of the integral development of the human being, many parents refuse to talk about sex with a teenage son. Perhaps to avoid discomfort for the young person or for the modesty and shame of the adult; the truth is that these types of conversations take place less frequently than necessary.

It is true that adolescents can receive talks on sexual and reproductive health in educational centers. However, the idea that young people have of sex comes from their own peers, from the media and, in the worst case, from porn.

Sex education is a task that falls to parents. If they do not carry it out, the minor can access confusing and harmful information. Thus, given the emotional importance of the first relationships, and taking into account the risks that they bring, it is essential that parents inform their children and resolve doubts.

Keys to talking about sex with a teenage son

Here we collect some tips and advice for talking about sex with a teenage son. There are a total of 6 proposals to put into practice.

The beginning of relationships in adolescence is a starting point for the discovery of sexuality.

Continuing education

If we think about talking about sex with a teenage son, we may imagine ourselves sitting at a table across from him, using a solemn tone and feeling uncomfortable. However, this is not the only way to approach sexuality and it does not have to be the most recommended.

Usually, It is preferable that this education occurs naturally and gradually, as the child grows. If in each evolutionary stage we adapt the language to transmit the most relevant information, it will reach adolescence with much clearer ideas.

Further, any relaxed moment (such as a car ride) may be appropriate for chatting about sexuality. Taking advantage of movies, songs or related everyday situations can open a door for us to approach the subject naturally.

Flexibility and tolerance

Some parents are too rigid when discussing sex with their children. They focus, above all, on labeling relationships negative or dangerous and judge and criticize other young people who decide to maintain them.

This often serves the purpose of discouraging your children from engaging in early sex. However, the result is usually not as expected.

By avoiding talking about a topic or by exposing it in a negative way, we will not make it cease to exist. The adolescent son will probably have sex anyway, but he will do so with a misconception and steeped in guilt and fear of disappointing his parents.

For the same, it is preferable to approach the subject with an open, flexible and tolerant mindset. In this way, the relationship of trust with the child will increase and he will feel safe to express doubts.

Keep reading: Tips to overcome sexual taboos

Clear and truthful information

Especially, provide your child with accurate information that can help him make conscious decisions. Talk about the risk of pregnancy and the transmission of diseases in different sexual practices. Explain the alternatives to protect yourself.

And don't forget to address the ethical and emotional plane of sexual relationships. You need to understand that respect (for oneself and the other) and emotional responsibility are essential.

Find out more: How can women protect themselves from STDs?

Other Helpful Tips for Talking About Sex with a Teen

In addition to the above, we recommend that you consider the following guidelines to ensure that your child receives appropriate sex education:

  • Ask and listen: It is preferable that you do not approach the talks about sexuality as a monologue on your part. Ask your child what they already know, what doubts and concerns they have, and what they want you to respond to. This will give you the opportunity to get to know your child's points of view.
  • Accept that you do not have the answers, if it is the case: Your child may ask you about a topic that you are not informed about or do not know well how to answer. Don't be afraid to assume it and invite him to search for the answers together. Going to a health professional can be beneficial and clarifying.
  • Your child may be more comfortable talking about sexuality with other people than with you: This is not a bad thing, as it can be enriching for him to have the support and opinion of other adults in the family. However, share your views with him as well and assure him that you will always be available to speak.

Talking about sex with a child does not have to be a task of punishment and confrontation or discomfort. It can be done in a relaxed way.

Talking about sex with a teenager will protect you physically and emotionally

Having a talk about sexuality with your child can be uncomfortable. However, it is necessary for you to know the dangers to which you are exposed and how to avoid them.

Having the right information will protect you from unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases, but it will also help you cope with peer pressure and avoid non-consensual relationships. Ultimately, the goal is that you can make responsible and informed decisions and that you know that you have an adult who will be there to guide and support you.