5 more problems treated in couples therapy

There are problems that are seen much more frequently in couples therapy consultations. Would you like to know which ones are they?

Last update: February 20, 2022

Going to couples therapy is a very important step. This means that there is some situation that both members of the relationship want to solve, but do not have the resources to do it without help. In couples therapy there are always some problems that are more frequent than others and on which we are going to reflect.

The General Council of Psychology of Spain (COP) reports that the vast majority of couples who attend therapy improve their marital satisfaction. This is quite encouraging.

When to go to couples therapy?

This is a very interesting question and one that many couples ask themselves. It seems that there is a deep-rooted belief that couple problems are resolved with communication and it is not necessary to go to any type of therapy. In fact, despite the fact that going to a psychologist is quite normalized, only 22.5% of the population has seen a specialist.

This percentage is further reduced in the case of couples. Thinking about going to therapy puts on the table the existence of a problem that must be paid attention to.

Therefore, the COP explains that you must go to couples therapy whenever the following circumstances occur:

  • When the couple’s relationship begins to deteriorate.
  • If there are thoughts of the type “I can not take anymore” or “I’m fed up”.
  • At the time when the search for a professional arises.

The most frequent problems treated in therapy

Now that we know a little more about when you should go to couples therapy, it is convenient to delve into those problems that are most frequently observed in consultations. This can give us many clues about what is going wrong in our relationships and about those beliefs that can lead us into painful relationships.

Frequent arguments that don’t find a way to resolve within the relationship may find a way out in therapy.

1. Poor communication

This is one of the problems that the COP points out as the main one. Not expressing what one thinks about a certain topic, keeping thoughts to himself for fear of harming or not being understood, These are situations that deteriorate any couple. It is necessary to work on assertiveness in the relationship and talk about everything, without exceptions.

2. Dead-end discussions

Another of the problems that are most frequently seen in consultation are the discussions that do not lead anywhere. But we are not referring to communicating different opinions, but to shouting and insults.

All this for trivial reasons that are not important; just plain nonsense. This can denote a lack of emotional management and communication.

3. Emotional manipulation

Emotional manipulation is also present within couple relationships. Despite loving the other person, the use of certain strategies to make them feel bad is not healthy at all.

We speak of passive-aggressive attitudes or the use of silence to show anger. They are ways of bonding that must be corrected.

4. Lack of acceptance

Another of the problems that is most observed in couples therapy consultations is the lack of acceptance. When the infatuation stage is over and you begin to see the flaws, a rejection begins to appear and an attempt to change how the other is. Again, manipulation can appear here.

5. Lack of quality time

The last of the usual problems is the lack of quality time. Work life, worries, children… All of this can put sex and solo plans on the backburner.

In the end, the relationship begins to not stand on its own and the arguments become more and more frequent. When this happens, you have to ask for help.

Tiredness and boredom are enemies of the couple. If they are not addressed early, they undermine the relationship.

Why not go to couples therapy?

Going to couples therapy is a very important step that lets you know if a relationship has a future or not. There are times when it is the beginning of a breakup, but we do not have to see this as something negative. Relationships are not always for life; Nor should they be forced when it is clear that they do not work.

Thanks to couples therapy it is possible to discover if there are options, what can be done to solve the problems that are damaging the relationship or if the time has come to put an end to it. But even so, therapy helps cut in the best way, without harming the other and even less the children.

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